Dentist Disaster

I've always taken pride in being able to take care of my teeth (I'm not into teeth whitening or anything silly like that).  I took pride in knowing that I have strong teeth and gums.  This pride resulted in me not thinking I needed to see a dentist, and so hadn't been to a dentist in 15 years.  A year ago this changed because two of my wisdom teeth (I allowed all my wisdom teeth to grow in on their own) were causing serious trouble.  Despite my best efforts, one wisdom tooth in particular became a very serious cavity.  So, I finally went to the dentist for this to have it removed, along with another that was somewhat problematic.  

The visit a year ago (and subsequent visits) went well.  I had the two wisdom teeth removed, and the dentist found just 3 cavities that didn't need crowns; just some fillings (the wisdom tooth was one of these 3 cavities).  However, it was discovered that I have periodontol disease, which is a gum disease where gingivitis becomes severe enough to where there can be bone loss.  There were subsequent treatments for this, which I agreed to undergo.  I was given a special mouth rinse which I've been using as suggested, and I was happy to learn from subsequent visits that my periodontol disease was on the road to recovery!

Then, I visited the dentist yesterday to learn that my periodontol disease was even worse than ever before.  The cleaning was very painful, and I was told that my periodontal disease was so bad that I needed to see a specialist.  The only idea why this has happened is because I started eating crackers as my main carbohydrate source.  After I got back home from the dentist, in a rage, I ended up throwing away all my crackers.

I was so pissed off over my teeth that I went zero carb most of the day yesterday.  I've modified my diet to go gluten free and dairy free, and am reducing my simple sugar intake even more, probably under 10g per day.  I'm also still going low carb until noon every day. 

I dreamed this afternoon (I take several naps per day unless I'm at work.  I take naps on my lunch break at work because I'm so fucking tired all the time) that I collapsed on the job.  I then had another 'energetic seizure' after I collapsed in the dream.  This was probably metaphorical for the clearing of the underground bases.  I'm in a total state of collapse.  I've been fighting it like crazy, but I just don't care anymore about the mission, or anything at all.  I don't care if I die.  I don't care if the world gets blown to bits.  Nothing matters.  

Work is a living hell.  There are not nearly enough workers at the store, and people keep calling in sick all the time.  My manager goes for 12 hours without a lunch break, and then (understandably) puts guilt trips on me to work more hours.  I hate working the hours I already have.  My job is a huge distraction from doing the meditations.  If people don't want to get jobs they can just starve when the grocery stores shut down from a lack of workers.

It is taking far too long to clear out the chimera.  To put it mildly, I'm out of patience.  I keep getting these stinging/burning sensations.  It feels like the meditations to remove the chimera are doing nothing at all.  Right now I'm so done with it all - 100% BURNED OUT.  Fuck everything.  

Hopefully this is just a phase though, and I'll get over it.  There are many times when I give up completely and let go, only to come back later full force.

I'll be back.


Comments

  1. SynJuly 15, 2021 at 9:03 AM

    I post this here in the hope that I've been brought here to give you some helpful information. Do you have or have had in the past amalgam (silver) fillings. I've was poisoned by mine and i'm in the process of detoxing and ridding myself from it. It is a complex subject with a lot of misinformation out there with dangerous protocols. I have found a very safe and successful one. If you are interested look up Andrew Hall Cutler and his work Amalgam Illness. There is an AC chelation support group on Facebook with a wealth of information and support. Hopefully you have never had amalgams. But if you have then you may have discovered the root cause to your health issues.

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